I have written before about how my “decision” to be childfree was more of a realization or an epiphany that occurred when I was a teen. As I described this the other day to a friend, I used the word relief. As in, when I realized that I did not have to have children, it was a huge relief to me.
With that description fresh in my mind, I noticed that every day I breathe a sigh of relief that I don’t have children. When I watch people drag their children around a store (or restaurant or art gallery or movie, etc.), I feel relieved. When someone’s child won’t stop [insert annoying behavior or noise], DH will smile at me and say, “Thank you for not wanting one of those!” When I’m exhausted or ill, I can’t help but be grateful that I am able to get the rest and recovery my body needs.
But it is not just during the bad times that I feel this way. As DH and I lounge on the couch holding hands and watching Star Trek… as I frolic through a zoo… as I spend a quiet evening alone at home listening to music… climb a mountain, walk the steps of the Acropolis, straddle the Prime Meridian, sit around the Christmas tree sipping eggnog, savor paninis at a café – in all of these wonderful moments, I still hear it ringing in the back of my mind, “I’m so glad I don’t have children.”
I acknowledge there are many people out there who enjoy spending time with kids and cannot imagine their lives without them (hey, I feel the same way about animals!). I am happy for them. I’m just relieved that I realized early enough in life that I would not be one of them, and I was able to make decisions accordingly.
