I have said (in some form or another) on many occasions in the blog that I believe God intended for me to not have children, and I find it a blessing, something for which I am abundantly grateful.
It's been a couple of months since my last post, and part of the reason for that (aside from sometimes simply running out of things to say!) is that some of the health issues that were going on back then in our household have escalated in unexpected ways.
As we have been facing doctors offices and hospitals, tests, medical bills, and the stress over health and finances, hardly a day has gone by when I haven't breathed a prayer of gratitude for being childfree. There have been a few days when I felt pushed to the edge of my sanity, and I thought, "How would I have possibly been able to handle this if I also had children to look after?!" Perhaps that makes me weaker than those who have to care for children while enduring similar trials, but I do believe that God knows my weaknesses and has spared me from an added emotional and financial burden that might have crushed me.
Life has fundamentally changed for us, and I expect that things are going to get worse before they get better, but we do find some comfort in the ways God has been demonstrating his care and faithfulness.
I am also grateful for those of you with whom I have had the pleasure of interacting on this blog. Even though most of us don't actually know each other, I am touched by your stories, struggles, and words of encouragement, and I do pray for you folks. Whenever God might bring us to your mind, I would be thankful for your prayers too.
Sorry to hear there are health issues in your home...sending best wishes! ~Laura Carroll http://lauracarroll.com
ReplyDeleteThank you, Laura.
DeleteI was wondering where you were. I check back now and then to read since you are one of the few CF Christian bloggers that actually keep up with your blog. So grieved to hear you have had such a difficult time lately! I will definitely be praying for you during this time.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Laelia.
DeleteI also believe God intended for me not to have children. Every once in a while, I seem to get a melanoma diagnosis...and with that medical rollercoaster, I am always thankful.
ReplyDeleteI hope that your home finds itself in a healthy state soon.
Wishing you good health too, KT. Thank you.
DeleteI just stumbled across your blog today, and I am so thankful. We are in our late 20s and do not have a desire for children. In our quest to find others like ourselves, we have come across some pretty interesting characters. Being that we are traditional, conservative Christians living in the South, we have felt very alone in our values while remaining childfree by choice. Your blog is a breath of fresh air.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear that there are health issues in your home. Praying for health and wellness to return soon.
Thank you. Having visited the South many times, I can imagine how isolated you must feel. We have a Southern friend who often tries to coax us into moving closer to him, and we have to keep reminding him that our family would be a complete mismatch for his city!
DeleteTake care.
Yep, I have lived in the South and I know that there is a lot of pressure to have children. I hope you find more couple friends who don't want children. I suggest looking on meetup.com for groups in your metro area that are for couples within your age bracket.
DeleteI am single and Christian and I want to get married and have children, but I support your choice too.
Sorry to hear about your health issues. I am a Christian and single, but I do hope to marry and then give birth to or adopt children in the future. I have always had a parental instinct and enjoyed being around the constant hustle and bustle of family life, but I know that it isn't for everybody. I have several friends who are Christians and don't want to have children. I think that it is good that you and your husband have decided to go against the pressure from other Christians for people to become parents.
ReplyDeleteI am also happy with finding your blog. I was just checking around for Christian blogs and then yours caught my attention. ;-) Me and my husband also don't desire having any children. I find it sometimes annoying with how a lot of people get once they hear this from us. Now we no longer care too much about this, as this is our decision.
ReplyDeleteBut I do find it sad how much society is most focused on everyone having a family, and well, most people our age either have their own family or wants to start having one. We are 30, and I feel as we might not have it easy with getting along with many our age, or close to our age. As I think most who do get their own family, also prefers to be-friend others being in the same situation as them. Over here where we live; There has been some people complaining about couples who doesn't want to have children. It is very annoying with such people, as well as they should go and mind their own buisnesses.
Society kinda blocks out couples that doesn't want to have any children, as well as those who wants to remain single. Most people will look at them, thinking more pity about them than respecting and accepting such choices made. I do beleive most of us learns about these things from we are little, about life being succesful and the most happy if you marry and get yourself your own family. This was the theory I beleived in when I was younger. But now I see it much more different.
My parents in law are fine with our choice, though I don't know about my parents. They seem to be expecting grandchildren from us, although they already have two grand daughters from my older sister, and probably my younger sister will also give them some. They don't know yet about our choice of not wanting to having any children. We will tell them, whenever the topic will come up. Not too sure about how they will take it, especially my mother can become very "drama queen" when not getting her will. But they have to learn living with it.
I also beleive God has a different plan for me and my husband, and that we are not supposed to becoming like average people being our age, those who choses having a family. I want to beleive we are meant to being different, but that we will also be greatly used by God. It is between us and God, also why people shouldn't judge too quick about this all.
I understand how hard it can be, it isn't always easy following outside of that popular stream. But it is all worth it, and remember; People like Albert Einstein and other similiar ones, they weren't following that same stream like everyone else, yet, without them, we wouldn't have come as far as we have now. ;-) And even though we might not become the same nor be the ones making a new discovery nor experiment, we can still make our own choices and chose following a different stream than where most people go. :-)
May God keep on blessing you and your husband, and may He also help you in whatever things you go through right now.
-Sylvia-
I don't think I fit into this Child free Christian blog, yet I want to share my story.
ReplyDeleteI am Christian and a recent birthmother. God has led my baby to a barren woman who will raise my baby as her own. I never wanted to be a parent. To give birth to a healthy baby girl at the age of 40 is a miracle.
It was with a heavy heart and a river of tears that I relinquished my newborn baby girl. All I can do now is wait for a reunion with my daughter....which may not happen. It has to be up to her if she wants to get to know me.
I thank God. I praise Jesus. He knows my heart and knows what's best for my daughter.
I have faith that God has a plan for this adoption triad.
All I can do now is pray, wait, and see.
Haydee, I wish you all the best. I hope for a reunion for you someday, if not in this life then in the next.
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