About this Blog

After banging my head in frustration over the obsession everyone around me had with procreation, I went online to find a community of people who were more like me. I have met some fascinating people along the way, but I have also found that many in the childfree community are quite hostile toward Christianity and a Christian world view. I understand that, unfortunately, many of my Christian sisters and brothers have given them a lot of ammunition (undoubtedly, I have been guilty of this at times too). Not wanting to be perceived as "trolling" for expressing my Christian perspective on other people's forums and blogs, I use my own blog to share my musings on childfree life while at the same time expressing my faith.

My intention is to show support to childfree people, both Christian and non-Christian, but from my own Christian perspective. Questions and constructive comments are welcome; negativity and intolerance are not.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Having a Child at All Costs

A recent Time magazine article reports on studies that link infertility treatments to autism. Apparently, women who have undergone infertility treatments have much higher rates of children with autism. While one study adjusted for the mother's age and ruled that out as the cause for autism, it is still unclear whether the fertility drugs are to blame, or the infertility itself, or other factors associated with fertility treatments, such as premature birth or multiple births.

And autism is not the only risk. IVF is also linked to birth defects and genetic defects, not to mention the physical and psychological toll that it can take on the mother.

It saddens me that our society idolizes motherhood and the passing on of our own genetic material to the point that we are willing to risk anything and everything to have a child. We are willing to create more children with a much higher risk of developmental disorders and birth defects while 140,000,000+ orphans -- many perfectly healthy -- cry for homes. We are willing to throw away thousands of dollars on this risk while children all over the world starve. We thumb our noses at nature and then react with surprise when nature strikes back.

And while I'm rambling... I wish our culture showed a little more compassion for people struggling with infertility. Instead of sweeping them away in the dogma of "you MUST have a child at all costs!", what if we showed them acceptance and alternatives? Maybe we could stop treating them as if they have no value unless their "disease" is cured, and focus on the other contributions they make to humanity.

I suppose I just don't understand the cult of procreation and the concept of risking it all to create a mini-me...


  1. BRAVO!!! And THANK YOU!

    I also find it sad that women regularly have the whole pronatalist party line shoved down our throats, sometimes seemingly every minute of every day!

    It's no wonder women dealing with infertility sometimes lose all perspective and basically go *nuts* in a desperate fight to conceive that all important child that will finally allow them into the "mommy club" and validate their existence.

    It really makes me want to puke. :(

    I'm glad there are people and blogs out there like you/rs and Child.freedom (to name just a couple) that show a life without children can be just as rewarding and IS just as valuable as that of one with children.

    Again, THANK YOU! :)

  2. You are welcome, and thank you for your kind words. It's always a pleasure to hear from you.

  3. It bothers me to hear people devaluate every woman who doesn't have children without realizing some women can't have children due to physical issues. Childfree women have to deal with such ignorance all the time, but I can't imagine how hurtful it is for a woman who really wanted children but couldn't to have to deal with it. A little more sensitivity should be in order.

  4. Boxing Tomboy, I absolutely agree. I think that many people don't realize how their prying questions or insinuations, while annoying to someone like me, could be downright devastating to someone who dearly wants to bear a child but cannot for whatever reason.
    Thank you for your comment.

  5. I'm not a Christian but I have to say "amen" to this. It's very heartening to know that I am not the only person that thinks this way.

    I have quoted you on my blog.