Today’s post is not against having hopes and dreams for one’s child, nor is it intended to diminish the value of raising children to do great things. It’s more a backlash against people who use having children as an excuse to isolate themselves in their own little world, expecting that their children will do the things that they themselves were not willing to do; and it is a backlash against people who try to convince me to procreate because of what my kid could potentially do, ignoring that I myself have an important, God-given function to perform on this planet. I also recognize that for some people, their purpose in life might in fact be to raise the next generation of good citizens rather than to engage firsthand in research, teaching, ministry, charity, etc. However, I tend to think that most of us are meant to do something more than just reproduce.
That being said, I think it is one of the biggest cop-outs in the world for people to leave it to their children to make an impact on society. Many people fantasize that their child will be the one to cure AIDS or become a future president or be a Nobel prize winner or whatever. It's great to try to raise productive members of society, but that should not be used to abdicate one’s own responsibilities. (Not only that, but what a tremendous and unfair burden to place on one’s child. Who can live up to that kind of expectation?)
The Bible is full of instructions regarding our impact on the world – and nowhere are we allowed to “pass the buck”…
- Let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:16 (emphasis mine)
- Care for orphans and widows in their distress. James 1:27 (not just “teach your children to do this”)
- The gifts he gave were that some would be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, some pastors and teachers, to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ. Ephesians 4:11-12 (we all have a job to do)
With respect to Christian ministry, some of Christ's last words in the Gospels were for his followers to go out into the world and spread the news of salvation (the "Great Commission", Matthew 28:18-20). YOU do it; don’t leave it up to someone else. Go into the existing world and preach. Christ did not say, "Go home and have lots of children so that you can create more followers for me." He told us to evangelize to those who are already here.
I’m definitely not saying that parenthood and service to God & society are mutually exclusive. But for anyone -- parents and nonparents alike -- to leave the responsibility to the next generation to serve God, rather than to make good use of the resources/talents God gave us, is wrong.
I leave you with the parable of the talents from Matthew 25:14-27.
For it is as if a man, going on a journey, summoned his slaves and entrusted his property to them; to one he gave five talents, to another two, to another one, each according to his ability. Then he went away. The one who had received five talents went off at once and traded with them, and made five more talents. In the same way, the one who had the two talents made two more talents. But the one who had received the one talent went off and dug a hole in the ground and hid his master’s money.
After a long time the master of those slaves came and settled accounts with them. Then the one who had received the five talents came forward, bringing five more talents, saying, “Master, you have handed over to me five talents; see, I have made five more talents.” His master said to him, “Well done, good and trustworthy slave; you have been trustworthy in a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your master.” And the one with the two talents also came forward, saying, “Master, you handed over to me two talents; see, I have made two more talents.” His master said to him, “Well done, good and trustworthy slave; you have been trustworthy in a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your master.”
Then the one who had received one talent also came forward, saying, “Master, I knew that you were a harsh man, reaping where you did not sow, and gathering where you did not scatter seed; so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. Here you have what is yours.” But his master replied, “You wicked and lazy slave! You knew, did you, that I reap where I did not sow, and gather where I did not scatter? Then you ought to have invested my money with the bankers, and on my return I would have received what was my own with interest. …throw [this slave] into the outer darkness.”
About this Blog
After banging my head in frustration over the obsession everyone around me had with procreation, I went online to find a community of people who were more like me. I have met some fascinating people along the way, but I have also found that many in the childfree community are quite hostile toward Christianity and a Christian world view. I understand that, unfortunately, many of my Christian sisters and brothers have given them a lot of ammunition (undoubtedly, I have been guilty of this at times too). Not wanting to be perceived as "trolling" for expressing my Christian perspective on other people's forums and blogs, I use my own blog to share my musings on childfree life while at the same time expressing my faith.
My intention is to show support to childfree people, both Christian and non-Christian, but from my own Christian perspective. Questions and constructive comments are welcome; negativity and intolerance are not.
My intention is to show support to childfree people, both Christian and non-Christian, but from my own Christian perspective. Questions and constructive comments are welcome; negativity and intolerance are not.
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I think you write very good as well as writing inspiring blogs.
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of what one earlier friend I had said. She said we had to pray for the next generation to be used by God. I told her that I thought we had to focuse more on how WE could be used by God now, and not just waiting for the next generation to come.
But now; I am a person that wants to be greatly used by God. I don't want to just sit there and doing nothing, or to just live a simple and comfortable life. I truly beleive God can use anyone, no matter what age we are, or what jobs we have, or how we look... as long as we are open and willing for God using us for His glory.